Get off your couch , step into my shoes

Dear old friend,

I missed how we used to hang out.
I missed how we used to be able to talk about anything under the sun.
I missed the many pacts we had and that includes you vowing not to ever leave me.
But sadly you did, my old friend.
I wonder to myself sometimes if we are still friends or if you still regard me as one.
Because I believe I do. Or maybe, you don't and you couldn't care less. I don't know.
I got on with my life, and you did too. And I am happy for you really, but sad at the same time for how things ended and what our friendship has become.
I had to fight the urge to text you. Because I believed you would, if you wanted to. But you never did. So I let the idea passed.
I remember how we used to cling on to the phone all the time with no regards of the happenings around us.
I remembered every single thing we did.
The movies, birthday cake, what we did once in the movie theater, church, the void deck, the basketball, sentosa, lounge, the conversations we had, the mugging for our examinations, and many other things I doubt you would wanna remember just so cos it's a pain in the ass to bear and remember.
I never once held grudges on you, or blamed you. Because I understand what I have done is too much for anyone to condone.
And really, I have no idea why I am still dwelling over our friendship that has alr ended 3 years back.
I am at loss of words at this point in time, and I have no idea how and why. Maybe my fingers can't keep up with the pace my mind is working and how my thoughts wander or maybe I lost my train of thoughts.
But I believe I am doing my best to translate whatever I have been containing all these while, all by myself. And I am letting it all out, at once. For the first time, and perhaps the last.
I deleted you 3 years back, and the only reason why I added you back just so only recently, was because I cared for my ego, because I have been waiting for you to realize so and make the approach instead, and because I have been waiting for the right moment to.
Remember the pact we had? To catch the Twilight Saga Series together with the same old clique? Well, Breaking Dawn Part 1 came out. And we caught it without you. Because I figured that you wouldn't want to, and you can't be bothered to, and to keeping the pact true. Spot on?
And sometimes I wonder you still think and look aback? Because I do sometimes. Or maybe you didn't and you don't, because it was nothing to you idk.
In any case, I wish you all the best in all your endeavors and whatever lies ahead of you.
Take care old friend. :)